Tag Archives: dreams

Reinvention

The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.” - Marcel Proust

Its been a while friends, though I did try posting last week, some sort of dodgy error. Anyway, thought I’d sit down – after a long while and get a cheeky post in.

Where have I been? Well, no where really, just been riding the tidal wave of life.

What have I been doing? Same, nothing really – just getting by, learning new things, finding new understandings, looking for more avenues of interest.

What’s new? Now this, this is long answer, lets just say the things I’ve experienced from this post and the last were character building. I’ve waded through many a gunk, only to realise I didn’t really need to. Now, I could elaborate but to be fair I’m too embarrassed, live and learn.

Every now again, what I like to do is go through a transformation, a reinvention of self – so that life doesn’t become too stagnant. I believe in reinvention as it allows a person to shed their mental baggage and have a different perception on life. And, I believe I have an avenue, there is an opportunity pending in the ether, which once solidified, I will inform you of. But, if large changes aren’t your thing – don’t fret, make small changes. Like a snowball, will gather speed and mass and eventually will show you your path.

For many a moon I’ve tried to create this effect, to now resolve, until now. Given that this is uncharted territory I am literally petrified, BUT hopeful. We must leap into the unknown to discover that which we’ve lost over the years…our self.

Live & Learn

If at first you don’t succeed, try again

I have one small criticism with this saying, they never tell you how many times you should try again. I think people who have become successful just try to confuse and convolute those who are trying to be successful. I have failed quite miserably this weekend. I was trying to launch my podcast feature this weekend, something I had pondered for over a year, much to my disgust I failed. The equipment let me down plus I hadn’t considered a few preliminary factors.

I thought something could be salvageable but was sorely mistaken, thankfully my friend was forthcoming. We have rescheduled the podcast for another date close by and we will be ready this time. Later in the day I went to a book signing, it was for the children’s author Aisha Mirza and her story Time for bed Zayd. Her friends and family had come from miles around to see her big moment. Aisha was absolutely glowing with the love and attention she was receiving, I was moved by her reading, really I was of a children’s book.

I spoke to an old friend and had a brief catch up, when I left I felt quite sad. You could put it down to jealousy but what I was truly pondering was my own career. I had now seen someone enjoy success first hand, and there I was enjoying the tatters of my dreams. Whilst I spoke to my friends he told me that we are writers in the company of writers, what we should be is writers in the company of readers. The parable of this could be fishermen throwing nets in a swimming pool with one fish swimming inside. Not exactly the most successful or intelligent of ventures.

I never really got a straight answer for my questions, but then I never do, what I did get was go where the readers are. Suddenly I did a little research into the matter, If I am a horror writer then where are the horror readers? My research confirmed what my friend had told me to do. This is not going to the absolute measure of success but I am going to give wattpad a go. Posting a chapter of my book fortnightly to generate a following. To what end I am not sure, but I am tired of failure.

So what have I learnt?

- Technology is temperamental

- don’t rely on others for success

- naivety deserves no quarter in life

- know yourself before you make assumptions about others

- things can go wrong, no matter how well you plan

The only thing I can do now is just plod along as always, you live and learn, simple as that.

Silence is Golden

“loose lips, sink ships”

Following on from my obsession with the orient and ninjas, there are a few more things I’d like to share. When I was younger, and still obsessed with ninjas, I’d always play computer games with ninjas in them. I loved creeping, hiding in the shadows, stalking targets and doing missions. It got so bad that I almost started doing that in real life, before someone entered the room I’d quietly hide somewhere, then jump out and scare them. Not a very healthy lifestyle, especially if you start doing that at work. You would need to keep quiet at all times otherwise the baddies would hear and come after you.

I suppose I will never get over ninjas but I won’t become one any time soon. I get criticised by friends at times for not hanging out, going on dinner outings or general get-togethers. I’ve become a social ninja of sorts, that I hardly have time for other people. My question is how do you pursue your dreams if everyone is trying to get you to come out. In our gatherings we always talk about strategies that will propel us to our desired horizons, but when you take steps towards them you get criticised for being unsociable. I believe if you have intelligent, understanding friends you won’t need to make allowances.

One advice a friends gave me, which he claims he doesn’t remember, was that if you have a dream, goal, aspiration etc keep quiet about it. His reasoning was that if you share your wishes with people, they’ll ridicule you and find weaknesses in the idea. This is normally out of malice, jealousy or they are dissatisfied with their own life and don’t want you to be happy. His words have wisdom, if you had the world’s most expensive diamond in your safe, you wouldn’t necessarily tell the whole town, boast at you coffers. No doubt you would be hated, probably robbed, its best to keep quiet.

I’ve had trouble keeping quiet in the past, I always got too excited about and idea, tell the world only to be shot down. But when others have “good ideas” they speak with such reverence for their own mediocrity, it actually makes me sick. Yes, I have known many hypocrites in my times, so before I become one, I do have something to share with you. At present I believe silence is Golden because I would rather show you than tell you. And you will see exactly what I mean when the time comes, on here on this fantastic website.

 

Rome will envy me

If people aren’t laughing at your dreams, your dreams aren’t big enough.

Here’s a question for you, why do people hate clichés? well, I don’t know the real answer because its based on perception, but relatively speaking its because clichés are close to the truth. As we all know truth hurts, as corny as it may be but practice does indeed make perfect, ask any martial artist. Musashi Myamoto propounded that even if you were to practice a thousand days you will still be a novice. That’s over 3 years worth of practice and still you don’t deserve a rank. That my friends is focus and dedication, no wonder people discredited him.

We always look for the easy way out, myself included as I mentioned in a previous post. True dedication comes from sacrificing the superficial for the dreams one holds dear. I understand that circumstance also plays a pivotal role in people’s endeavours, the trick is to not let them become the excuse for your inequities. I only speak of myself here, but I bet if you’re truthful, at some point you can relate to this. I realised that I was different than others when I dreamed different.

When I was a boy, whilst most boys my age could mentally de-construct and label parts of a lamborghini diablo, I couldn’t even spell lamborghini. I hated football, again another pleasure for the boys my age, personally I liked martial arts. I was considered weird, although I’m thinking that could’ve been because of the long, leather, morpheous-esque coat I used to wear. I made peace with these social differences a long while back. I had something these lads didn’t, a fantastic talent.

You see friends anyone can be a writer, in your mind, in your soul, heart whatever you want to call it. I was more than a mere writer, I was a dreamer and with a dynamic imaginative complex I was able to weave some pretty tantalising tales. No one truly appreciated this talent, honestly neither did I until I began to see dividends for it. I now have bigger dreams.

Now I want to create an empire, that will rival Rome. Your gut instinct is to laugh, am I right? or if you’re polite I think you deem me somewhat deluded? In any case I have this dream, but more so than that I have vision. If you could paint a path to your dreams what would it look like? I can tell you, you are looking at my map as you read. Hidden in every line I’ve written and you’ve read are thoughts, these are digital way points that I have erected. I don’t expect you to understand my exuberant rantings, I expect you to laugh at me.

I am a living cliché and I deserve to be ignored, I’m wondering how long will you?